Since I gave birth to my little girl in 2014, I’ve felt nothing but dread when summer arrives. It’s not because of the New Mexico heat, not because I have to buy a new summer wardrobe (my size is always fluctuating).
I hate it because I have to wear a swimsuit.
I go and buy a tankini that is supposed to cover up my stomach area. And it comes with little shorts instead of bikini bottoms. That should do the trick right? Not a chance. I’m so uncomfortable the whole time I’m wearing the suit. After getting into the water, the tankini top just clings to every roll on my belly, and I can’t put on my clothes fast enough.
On one hand, I tell myself, “Well, everyone knows I just had a baby, so my belly pouch is expected, right?” And then on the other hand, “Why aren’t I working out more? I so want to be that well-put-together mom!”
When I put on swimsuits, I instantly feel like every stretch mark is popping out. My breasts feel like they are hanging lower than usual. And I imagine my husband is embarrassed to be seen with me like this. But this is not reality and this needs to stop.
After having baby number two, I quite literally do not have the time to stress about this and just shouldn’t put myself through this. It’s just one more burden to carry, and this summer it comes to a stop. I’m vowing this summer to let it all hang out and just be happy.
Do you ever see another mom at the pool just playing with her kids, being playful with her partner, just looking like she doesn’t have a care in the world at that moment? Let’s be that mom!
Let’s consciously make the effort to go put that swimsuit on and be happy with with our postpartum bodies! Easier said then done, I know. But this is my goal this summer.
Trying swimsuits On
Let me help you not waste your time at the wrong stores. There are so many styles this season, so much to choose from, but if you’re anything like me, you have no idea what you want. Where to start?! Well have no fear. I did the investigation for you.
Target seems to have the biggest variety for all shapes and sizes. There I found maternity suits, plus size, mix and match tops and bottoms, the high waisted bottoms (my favorite!), ruffle-trim bandeau tops, everything!
Old Navy is also a mom’s dream come true for swimsuits! I’ve found that you just have to try on the pattern or color that speaks to you. I have a cheetah print bikini, not because I thought a bikini style would best suit my figure, but because cheetah print is my favorite! Get something that catches your eye, but you just aren’t sure if you could bring yourself to actually wear it.
There’s nothing more liberating then wearing your new suit for the first time with all the confidence in the world. My husband has actually gotten on me many times about my self-doubt. He tells me it’s all about wearing things with confidence. He hasn’t had two babies. Who is he to say it’s all about the confidence? But he’s actually right. It’s like the mom at the pool without a care in the world, I mentioned earlier. She didn’t have a perfect body, but it’s not something I even noticed because I was just in awe of her confidence and happiness.
Set the Example
I’ve always had body issues. Who hasn’t? As a child I was made fun of for being chubby. In high school I was too thin. Now I’ve given birth to two kids and have a pouch and stretch marks to prove it. I could go on. But that’s the thing. I don’t want to keep going on like this.
Worrying about how I look in a swimsuit is exhausting.
I do not want my little girl to hear me complain to her father about how fat I look. Or hear me bemoan that if maybe I got a tan I would look thinner. We want our children to be happy, right? Well it starts with the moms. If they see us happy and just simply putting on our swimsuits without the tears and anxiety, then maybe we can set their confidence up for success. We had babies, and therefore now have extra weight, saggy tummies and stretch marks, but we have to get past that! Having babies is like the most beautiful super power a woman could have. We should be proud of that and just go out on the swimsuit.
” I found I was more confident when I stopped trying to be someone else’s definition of beautiful and started being my own.” – Remington Miller