Ah February, it’s the month of love. Stores are filled with pink and red decor and my kids are spotting hearts everywhere as people are getting ready for Valentine’s Day. Love is in there air. But in my house, there seems to be a lack of it.
After having our third baby four months ago, survival has been the name of the game. And now that we are finally getting back into a routine, I’m beginning to see where some things have been overlooked and have caused some problems. We are irritable and easily angered when we should be patient and kind. Not only is it affecting my husband and I but it’s also affecting they way my older kids interact and that makes me sad.
It’s time to make a change. It’s time to start thriving instead of just surviving.
I can’t force my kids to get along but I can try to lead by example. So in the month of February, I am going to challenge myself to love my people better starting with my husband. And moms of Albuquerque, I’d like to challenge you to do the same. And if you are a single momma or your husband isn’t in the picture, I’d like to challenge you to apply these same principles to your children.
Here’s how I’m going to challenge myself to love my husband and my family better:
Put Down the Phone
You know you have a problem when your husband bets that you can’t go a whole evening without checking your phone. Well, challenge accepted my dear! I’m going to try to have designated phone and internet times and other than that, I’ll be leaving my phone plugged in next to my bed.
Speak His Love Language
Back in the day, before kids, I read the Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman and discovered that my hubby loves quality time. I used to pride myself on knowing and speaking his love language, but eight years and three kids into our marriage, I’ve struggled to give him the time he needs.
Sing His Praises
Us mommas like to chat when we get together and it can be so tempting to go on and on about all the things our hubbies do wrong. I’ve been tempted to join this bandwagon even when I really don’t have any complaints about mine. But instead, I am going to make a conscious effort to praise him in front of others and who knows, maybe it will become a trend.
Ask for Feedback
Sometimes I don’t take criticism well, especially when it comes from my husband. As hard as it might be, I’m going to check in and ask him how well I am doing at loving him. I’ll ask him how he felt loved recently and what I can do better in the future and I am going to be prepared to hear the truth.
My hope is that in taking these small steps, my relationship with my husband and my kids will change and that love, not anger and frustration, will be the theme in our household.
So, what do you think? Are you up for the challenge?